Posts Tagged ‘Jacquelne Laurita’

The Return of ‘Real Housewives Of New Jersey’: Is Danielle’s Hole As Big As the Lincoln or Holland Tunnel?

May 4, 2010

Teresa Giudice, Caroline Manzo and Jacqueline Laurita at the premiere party Monday night

The Real Housewives of New Jersey were back Monday night, and we celebrated the event with them.

Caroline Manzo, her sister-ih-law Jacqueline Laurita, and last season’s table flipper, Teresa Giudice, had a party for the second season premiere of Bravo’s “The Real Housewives of New Jersey” at the Brownstone Inn in Paterson, N.J. Caroline’s husband owns the venue, as any fan of the show knows. Money from the party, which was $150 for some tickets, will go to three of the charities that the women support. About 600 people attended the soiree.

There was a red carpet, and we were standing with the paparazzi, including many who actually made the trip from Manhattan to this mysterious land called the Garden State. Hey, you don’t have this kind of event in Sheboygan!

While we waiting for the fun to start we spotted Albert Manzo, who has lost 70 pounds since the first season, with the help of a magic stomach band. One of the scenes is the first episode of this season is of Caroline taking him to Barney’s in NYC to get fitted for a suit. The bill? $8,000 to $9,000. We told him he looked great, and he smiled. A real nice guy.

Both Giudice and Laurita have babies in the second season, so they have a lot in common.

The Giudice family, with the ladies and their matching outfits

But the first one down ther carpet was Giudice, with huge Jersey hair and lots of big jewelty. She and her three little girls (the baby was home) were all rocking lucious purple dresses with rosettes around the neckline. One of the little girls was carrying a Loius Vuitton purse, while the other one had Juicy Couture. Bot bad for kids under 8.

Right off the bat we had to ask Giudice about the juiciest quote from the first Season Two installment, which is her quote. The villain, in case you’ve been living under a rock, in “Real Housewives of New Jersey” is Danielle Staub. She is the only one of the housewives who is single, and last season she was furious when the other ladies dug up information about her shady past. The housewives Caroline and Teresa hate Staub, who is quite the sexually liberated woman.

In Monday’s show, Giudice learned that Staub has hooked up with a friend’s boyfriend’s friend, yet another notch in her belt.

“She must have slept with at least like 500 guys,” Giudice said. “Her hole must be as big as not the Lincoln Tunnel, not the Holland Tunnel, what’s the longest tunnel?”

Andy Cohen claims he's a longtime Jersey fan. Yeah, right.

How did that make it past Bravo’s censors? Were they taking a siesta? For those who live outside of the Tri-State area, those tunnels are pretty damn big.

When we asked her about it, Giudice basically said she was just telling it like it is, just like we Jersey folk do. Her exact quotes are here in our story for

Giudice’s husband Joe was standing on the side of the carpet while his wife was being interviewed, and someone asked him, “You getting used to all this?”

“A little bit,” Joe said, “You don’t get a choice.”

Giudice also told us that Joe doesn’t want to “get snipped,” which would ensure that she doesn’t get pregnant again. A bit too much information.

Bravo host Andy Cohen was on the carpet as well. When we asked him what was with the flood of Jersey reality shows, he said, ““I think it’s a great place. I think it’s ripe. Look, who doesn’t love people from Jersey?”

“People from New York, for years,” we shot back at him.

“I do (like New Jersey),” Cohen said. “I’m from New York. It’s (Jersey) fun, its got a vibe.”

“But I’ve been hearing cracks about Jersey from Manhattanties for years,” we told him.

Cohen then said that New Yorkers are “crusty, mean people.”

Realizing his tongue had gotten a little loose, Cohen said, “I’m kidding. I’m from New York City. Don’t take that out of context. I was kidding.”

Jacqueline Laurita and husband Chris, her errant daughter Ashley and the older boyfriend

No problem Andy.

Laurita, clad in deep purple like Giudice, was so tiny we mistook her for her teenaged daughter. She was wearing black lace Louboutin shoes. She had picked up her Roberto Cavalli dress in Neiman Marcus.

It was Jacqueline’s husband Chris’s birthday. He is the brother of Caroline and Dina Manzo, who is also in “Real Housewives of New Jersey.”

Caroline Manzo looked gorgeous, much younger than she appears on the tube. She had a satiny beige one-shouldered Kay Unger dress she said she bought the night before at Bloomingdales.

Jill Zarin, one of “The Real Housewives of New Yoik,” was also in the house with her husband Bobby. She was thin as a reed, and friendly. What was she doing in Jersey?

“I’m here to support my girls,” Zarin said. “They’re authentic.”

The food at the Brownstone — including short ribs with meat so tender it fell off the bone — was delicious. The apple martinis were tangy, and free. The dessert bar included mini zeppoles, pignoli cookies, waffles with different toppings, macaroons, fruit, carrot cake and cheese cake.

We sneaked a brownie, a macaroon and a pignoli cookie in our purse in a knapkin and took them home.

Caroline Manzo's husband Albert, the owner of the Brownstone Inn, has lost 70 pounds. Looking good Albert.

The first episode was shown on a large screen TV in a ballroom at the Brownstone, with several hundred people watching.

We had to laugh out loud when the audience booed when Staub came on the screen, and cheered when Manzo, Giuidice and Laurita were depicted.

We Jersey girls are a tough crowd.

For our birthday, our friend Ann gave us a circle pendat that says “Jersey Girl” that we saw and loved down in Manasquan. So asked the store owner if middle-aged women bought the pendant like us, or was it just kids?

They looked at us like we were nuts. Of course women of all ages buy the pendant. That Jersey girl thing is a state of mind, it has nothing to do with age.